July 22.
And just like that, vacation is over. :(
We returned home yesterday morning, and the adventure that is Panama began immediately. We had to go to the interior to pick up the dogs. What should have taken us 2.5 hours ended up taking 4 thanks, in part, to issues with the police. Sigh. We're back.
But, on the happy side, this was my favorite summer vacation since we moved to Panama. As we discussed the reasons for why, the explanation became clear. This was the first true summer vacation we've had.
Normally, we go to friends' and families' houses. And, we love getting to see everyone. We love reconnecting and laughing and catching up and feeling like we belong again. Those summers have restored my soul in deep ways; however, they're also exhausting because we are always "on." Trying to make up for a lost year in 2 hours is a lot to handle. Doing it for 3 straight weeks is beyond draining. We don't get down time.
Now, some people will surely think that our 4-week, 13-flight, 11-location summer of this year sounds like less down time than our normal 2 locations. It was, depending on what makes "down time" for you. I realized that, for me, down time is getting to be just the 6 of us laughing and learning and doing life together. I decompress as we explore together. And, we got to spend time with people here and there.
It's a balancing act that I haven't completely figured out. There are so many ways and times that I realize how much we've lost by living this Panamanian adventure. My kids aren't making forever friends or having cousin camps. They don't get to experience the calm of endless summer nights with the kids of their parents' friends from high school. We aren't always able to run down the street to see the people our souls long for. Our life doesn't have the kind of status quo that brings security.
On the other hand, my kids have seen so much of the world. They understand different kinds of people. Their world is so much bigger than mine will ever be. They speak two languages. They want to change a world that is bigger than a three-state area. They know how to make friends really well. They are willing to take the risk of loving people who won't be around forever. They learn that the hurt of saying goodbye is worth it to have experienced the relationship. My kids have seen the value of people trying to stay in relationship.
This summer we got to spend time with the family and friends who made it work. There were also friends and family who desperately wanted to see us- and us to see them- but we couldn't make it work. Those people also touched my heart because they cared enough to try. And believe me when I tell you that matters to me. I messaged with friends from our life in Georgia. We brainstormed and dreamed about how maybe we could see each other realizing that it wouldn't happen. My heart is full the same, because there are some people who don't even try. Don't even pretend to care. Every year, our core number of people grows smaller. Every year, the people who do try mean more to me than they did the year before.
Over the next couple of weeks, I'm sure I'll be sharing pictures of our time in the US. I have many lessons I've learned that I want to share. For today, though, I am just going to rest in the gratitude of having spent a wonderful (and safe) 30 days with my family.
To remembering that 6 is my perfect number,
L
We returned home yesterday morning, and the adventure that is Panama began immediately. We had to go to the interior to pick up the dogs. What should have taken us 2.5 hours ended up taking 4 thanks, in part, to issues with the police. Sigh. We're back.
But, on the happy side, this was my favorite summer vacation since we moved to Panama. As we discussed the reasons for why, the explanation became clear. This was the first true summer vacation we've had.
Normally, we go to friends' and families' houses. And, we love getting to see everyone. We love reconnecting and laughing and catching up and feeling like we belong again. Those summers have restored my soul in deep ways; however, they're also exhausting because we are always "on." Trying to make up for a lost year in 2 hours is a lot to handle. Doing it for 3 straight weeks is beyond draining. We don't get down time.
Now, some people will surely think that our 4-week, 13-flight, 11-location summer of this year sounds like less down time than our normal 2 locations. It was, depending on what makes "down time" for you. I realized that, for me, down time is getting to be just the 6 of us laughing and learning and doing life together. I decompress as we explore together. And, we got to spend time with people here and there.
It's a balancing act that I haven't completely figured out. There are so many ways and times that I realize how much we've lost by living this Panamanian adventure. My kids aren't making forever friends or having cousin camps. They don't get to experience the calm of endless summer nights with the kids of their parents' friends from high school. We aren't always able to run down the street to see the people our souls long for. Our life doesn't have the kind of status quo that brings security.
On the other hand, my kids have seen so much of the world. They understand different kinds of people. Their world is so much bigger than mine will ever be. They speak two languages. They want to change a world that is bigger than a three-state area. They know how to make friends really well. They are willing to take the risk of loving people who won't be around forever. They learn that the hurt of saying goodbye is worth it to have experienced the relationship. My kids have seen the value of people trying to stay in relationship.
This summer we got to spend time with the family and friends who made it work. There were also friends and family who desperately wanted to see us- and us to see them- but we couldn't make it work. Those people also touched my heart because they cared enough to try. And believe me when I tell you that matters to me. I messaged with friends from our life in Georgia. We brainstormed and dreamed about how maybe we could see each other realizing that it wouldn't happen. My heart is full the same, because there are some people who don't even try. Don't even pretend to care. Every year, our core number of people grows smaller. Every year, the people who do try mean more to me than they did the year before.
Over the next couple of weeks, I'm sure I'll be sharing pictures of our time in the US. I have many lessons I've learned that I want to share. For today, though, I am just going to rest in the gratitude of having spent a wonderful (and safe) 30 days with my family.
\
Jackson Square, New Orleans
To remembering that 6 is my perfect number,
L
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