2018 Word. Of. The. Year.
But first!
We have a little announcement to make.
No more trying to fit in with people who have no interest in having me.
No more trying to be a persona I don't even like.
No more explaining away my passions.
No more letting circumstance determine who I am.
In light of this, I have a few goals and changes I'm enacting...
1. This blog is going mostly away. I'll post most Sundays and that's it. I don't love blogging like I once did, and I'm tired of feeling like I'm disappointing people if I don't keep some crazy standard. Once a week is all I can do, and it's all I will do. (I do have this sneaking suspicion that as the year progresses, my inner blogger will fall in love with writing again because it will come from a real place instead of the abstractness I've forced on myself.)
2. I'm going back to being vegan. Why? Because, that's what makes me feel whole. And, why is it going to stick this time?? Because I'm going to do it for not just health reasons but for a whole slew of other, "crazy" reasons like caring about animals and the environment and people.
3. I'm falling in love with the real Jesus of the Bible. I'm tired of what so many Christians have turned Jesus into. I watch stories coming out of the American church, and I'm embarrassed. Of course, there are SO many living lives that mirror the New Testament church, but there are MANY more who aren't. I want to be real. I want Jesus to say "That one's mine" when He talks about me. This year, if you need me, I'm in my room with the Word and the Spirit.
4. I'm going to continue making an utter fool of myself in love. My absolute favorite thing about me is that I love hard. I want to keep it up. And, I want to care less when people mock me for loving those who screw up in spite of the screw ups. Whether it's people or puppies, I want to love well. But, I need to make one change. I want all those I love to know it. My heart breaks for others' hurt, but I've become aware that my pain is often misconstrued as disappointment in people. I'm so thankful for the people who've brought that to my attention. So, in this Me year,
5. I'm getting rid of blind spots- those places that I think I'm ok, and I'm not. Revelation 3:2 is one of my favorite verses. It's a warning that I hold very near to my heart.
We have a little announcement to make.
Say "hello" to Chicheme Jordan.
He was my Christmas present that I got on Thanksgiving Day, and I couldn't be anymore grateful for his fluffy self. Cosita is less thrilled, but we're confident that they'll be good friends some day!
With that out of the way, it's time to get on to the business of new years and new words.
2017's year was BEYOND And it suited the year perfectly. I did ugly love. I did lose fear and try new things. It was a year of highs and lows I never expected. It was truly beyond expectation.
As I thought about this year, I was trying to decide between ponder and joy. Neither word excited me, but I felt drawn to choose between the two of them. As I asked the Lord, He gave me a new word. I told him, "no" to his word because no one picks a word like that.
Since I refused to go with His word, He told me to ponder joy. Really, Jesus- ponder joy? First that sounds completely cliche, and I don't want to think the two words together. I want You to tell me which one, so I can blog and be going on with my life.
Ponder joy.
Again and again I got that. So I stopped being a brat and pondered what joy means to me.
As I did, I saw that the word the Lord gave to me isn't as cringey as I originally thought.
The word the Lord gave me is Me.
Like Jesus is Me. And I'm Me, too.
Y'all, I'm going to be 40 this year, and I couldn't be more excited about that fact. I believe the Lord wants this year to be the year I let go of everything that isn't about me and Us and Him. In that place, I'll find joy.
I'm too old to care what other people think of me.
I'm too old to worry about second guessing myself.
I look back on my life, and I realize that most of the major decisions in my life were made to please someone else. And, lots of the time it didn't please them. I have always been confident in myself, but even I have my areas that make me question whether I should be trusted to make decisions.
I'm over that.
This year, I'm going to trust that Jesus made me the way He wanted me made.
No more trying to fit in with people who have no interest in having me.
No more trying to be a persona I don't even like.
No more explaining away my passions.
No more letting circumstance determine who I am.
In light of this, I have a few goals and changes I'm enacting...
1. This blog is going mostly away. I'll post most Sundays and that's it. I don't love blogging like I once did, and I'm tired of feeling like I'm disappointing people if I don't keep some crazy standard. Once a week is all I can do, and it's all I will do. (I do have this sneaking suspicion that as the year progresses, my inner blogger will fall in love with writing again because it will come from a real place instead of the abstractness I've forced on myself.)
2. I'm going back to being vegan. Why? Because, that's what makes me feel whole. And, why is it going to stick this time?? Because I'm going to do it for not just health reasons but for a whole slew of other, "crazy" reasons like caring about animals and the environment and people.
3. I'm falling in love with the real Jesus of the Bible. I'm tired of what so many Christians have turned Jesus into. I watch stories coming out of the American church, and I'm embarrassed. Of course, there are SO many living lives that mirror the New Testament church, but there are MANY more who aren't. I want to be real. I want Jesus to say "That one's mine" when He talks about me. This year, if you need me, I'm in my room with the Word and the Spirit.
4. I'm going to continue making an utter fool of myself in love. My absolute favorite thing about me is that I love hard. I want to keep it up. And, I want to care less when people mock me for loving those who screw up in spite of the screw ups. Whether it's people or puppies, I want to love well. But, I need to make one change. I want all those I love to know it. My heart breaks for others' hurt, but I've become aware that my pain is often misconstrued as disappointment in people. I'm so thankful for the people who've brought that to my attention. So, in this Me year,
5. I'm getting rid of blind spots- those places that I think I'm ok, and I'm not. Revelation 3:2 is one of my favorite verses. It's a warning that I hold very near to my heart.
“To the angel[a] of the church in Sardis write:
These are the words of him who holds the seven spirits[b] of God and the seven stars. I know your deeds; you have a reputation of being alive, but you are dead. 2 Wake up! Strengthen what remains and is about to die, for I have found your deeds unfinished in the sight of my God. 3 Remember, therefore, what you have received and heard; hold it fast, and repent. But if you do not wake up, I will come like a thief,and you will not know at what time I will come to you.
To not wanting to be just a reputation. To truly being awake with the Father. To 2018,
L
Comments