Sept 9
I missed a week.
Last Sunday, I was having a teensy tiny mental collapse.
I spent Friday and Saturday having the most amazing time at my school's Senior Retreat. Sunday, I was in bed ALL day convinced of my total inability to succeed in grad school. It took me 8 hours to write 4 sentences of an essay. Blogging was not going to happen.
The rest of the week improved from there. My attitude slowly, but consistently, turned around; I successfully turned in 13 assignments for my 2 classes. Thank you to those who prayed for me and made me believe that I was not in over my head. My mantra for the week? "I'd rather try and fail than just quit." And it's true. Even if I flunk out of grad school- which is not highly likely- I would rather that to just giving up. Trying matters.
I normally try to share a picture that sums up the week. As I'm sitting here going through my gallery, I have lots of screenshots and video pics from school work. Maybe I should share one of those? Do you care about APA-style essays? I don't really either.
So, this is the only non-work memo picture I have...
Last Sunday, I was having a teensy tiny mental collapse.
I spent Friday and Saturday having the most amazing time at my school's Senior Retreat. Sunday, I was in bed ALL day convinced of my total inability to succeed in grad school. It took me 8 hours to write 4 sentences of an essay. Blogging was not going to happen.
The rest of the week improved from there. My attitude slowly, but consistently, turned around; I successfully turned in 13 assignments for my 2 classes. Thank you to those who prayed for me and made me believe that I was not in over my head. My mantra for the week? "I'd rather try and fail than just quit." And it's true. Even if I flunk out of grad school- which is not highly likely- I would rather that to just giving up. Trying matters.
I normally try to share a picture that sums up the week. As I'm sitting here going through my gallery, I have lots of screenshots and video pics from school work. Maybe I should share one of those? Do you care about APA-style essays? I don't really either.
So, this is the only non-work memo picture I have...
This is my hey-Tony-I-guess-we-just-bought-a-house-but-that-does-not-feel-as-exciting-as-it-sounds face. We did buy a house this week. A house in Illinois. It's a long story, and we aren't moving. It was just about the most adult thing I think I've ever done though. That's good, right?
And, you can see that my new hair gel is working miracles! I've gone from frizz to beachy waves with one new product! How's that for an exciting week!
The other major milestone from the week? September 5th happened. That means I'm officially 39 and 11/12. 40 is coming, and I couldn't be more excited! As you know, I am desperately afraid of death and dying. Well, I used to be. 7 years ago, I would have been paralyzed with fear at the thought of turning 40. I made the conscious decision last year to embrace the milestone. There were times when I was full blown faking my way into liking the idea of turning 40. But not now! 40 feels like it brings the gift of being who I am. I'm officially, officially an adult, and I no longer have to be stuck in the patterns of youth. Patterns that caused me to worry. Or compare myself to others. Or worry about what someone might think. 40 means that I answer only to Jesus, and He and I are doing fine! (even with the occasional teensy tiny mental collapse)
To believing in yourself without hesitation,
L
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